The great non-alcoholic experiment continues. While I took a one day break on Saturday due to various celebrations, I am continuing to learn how to deal with social situations without embibing alcohol. It is entirely too weird a feeling. However, if I am to be able to overcome my issues, it is imperative to learn how to deal with my social anxiety.
Ironically enough though, I am about to go buy a bottle of wine. As a gift!
Some days are better, some are worse. Today is a bad one. There is a lot of anxiety, and stress, and sadness. This is one of those days when I feel Her absence stronger than most days. If only I could hear Her voice reassuring me that everything is going to be OK… Alas, as I am freaking out in my room, all there is is a ringing silence.
I also feel that I desperately need a drink. I’m hoping to be able to resist. Trying to kill this pain with booze is a road that leads to way worse shit than I already am in up to my neck.
As stupid and unhealthy as it is, I can not not think about Her and tell myself that She won’t be there when I come through. I need Her!
Fuck this shit!!!
Forlorn Hope: A Diary Of A Broken Heart 